best

ever.
from what I can remember.
I would like more, please.

& all the pain went away. I couldn't feel it. It was some of the best hours of this year. & I would like some more, but my fingers aren't crossed.

Christmas 2009

I had an amazing day.
I just spent the day at home with my mum (except for her daily coffee run)

I woke up 7 am needing to pee (as usual), and since mum has told me the night before she wanted to start the day around 10 am or so, I willed myself back to sleep. Waking up 2 hours later at 10 am, i rushed out of bed to wake up my mum and wish her a Merry Christmas! She wanted to stay in bed and wake up for an extra 10 mins, so I let her, while I opened up the goodies in my santa stocking. Inside my santa stocking were two mini boxes of Lindt chocolate, a plastic christmas bell with jellybells and a walking penguin toy, mini gingerbread men, and three nailpolishes from Sportsgirl - minty green, watermellony pink, and a shiny light purple).
Mum came out into the dining room where we opened all of our presents and waited for breakfast to be cooked.
I got for my mum a $40 JB-HiFi gift voucher, seasons 1 & 2 of Flight of the Concords, Best of Annie Lennox CD/DVD, Cadel Evans autobiography, box of Lindt chocolate, block of Lindt dark chocolate with orange, Byron Bay Cookie Co. cookies, a box of stamps, dragonflies to use for scrapbooking, and an apron (which was worn pretty much all day!!!)
My mum got me electric beaters, two Women's Weekly cookbooks, Fierce by Kelly Osbourne, Buffy collectors edition boxset, underpants, a manicure kit, 10 Things I hate About You DVD, Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion DVD, The Sixth Sense DVD, The Castle DVD, The Addams Family Values DVD, Now And Then DVD, 1000 Things To Do In London for 10pounds book.

After all the presents were unwrapped, it was time for breakfast, out tradition of croissants - so yummy!!! With raspberry jam. Such an awesome breakfast!!!

After breakfast, we flicked through our books, and I sent a few merry christmas text messages, and then got dressed and went out to get mum her coffee. I wore my new lace dres (which is VERY cute), and then we came home and started watching the DVDs we had gotten. We ate some nuts (and I ate half a carrot), and then mum decided it was time to start cooking tea - and to start drinking champagne.
After a while, dinner was ready - roast turkey, and vegies (parsnip, potato, sweet potato, pumpkin, corn on the cob and brocollini). Dinner was good!!! (except the turkey was really salty, which I didnt really enjoy). After eating dinner, me and mum just sat at the table talking for aaaaaaaaaaaages and drinking lots of champagne. I thought it was great - we haven't sat down and talking like that for such a long time. We also kept drinking lots of champagne (and got a little drunk), and then we had some dessert! Mum had made a christmas pudding yesterday, which was saved for dessert, which we had with thick cream - it was such a good pudding!!! (We even had seconds).
After leaving the table, we decided to watch some more DVDs till we got all tired (the champagne probobly got to our heads aswell), so it we both went to bed.

Till I realised I couldn't sleep (as usual), so thought it would be a good idea to write this christmas blog before I forgot all about christmas day.

I had an amazing christmas day :) minus all the pain in my leg and waiting for every four hours till when I could next take more painkillers, it was a great day with good presents and good food and an awesome conversation, and even looking at photographs (and myself not recognising my own grandfather).
I really do wish for more christmases like today to come. Even if it is just only me and my mum, its the only thing I know, and the only thing I like, especially on days like christmas and birthdays.

december twenty three

It's been exactly one year since I got the surgery on my hip.
Towards the end, I didn't really want the surgery, as I knew there was a 50/50 chance of the surgery not getting rid of the pain, and I was thinking, why get the surgery, which is going to be painful anyway, and possibly come out the other side, still in pain?
But my friend at the time said to get it, and it could work and whatever else was said (I wasn't really paying much attention to a lot of things which were said to me around that point in time).
Obviously, the surgery didn't work, and one year on from the surgery (and nearly 3 years on from the car accident), I'm still in pain.
If anything, the pain is worse. For the past three and a half weeks, the pain has been so bad, at one stage I was taking 6 different types of pain killers a day. I spent a day in hospital. I've been to the doctors more times these past few weeks then I can count on one hand, and right now, I'm constantly counting down the hours till I can next take more pain killers (right now, I only have a 20 min wait). This is not how I imagined I would be living like at 22. This is not how I imagined the rest of my life would be like.

It sucks to be me.

For a while, all I want to do is just sit and cry. Lay down and cry. I just want to cry till I can't cry anymore. The pain is just getting to me and I don't know how to deal with it anymore. Just the constant day in, day out really bad pain is doing my head in. Not mention it being Christmas time, and as I get older, more things make me dis-like Christmas - and this is another reason to dis-like Christmas. I've always felt a little more sad then usual around Christmas time. Knowing it's another year of being permanently in pain makes me a little more upset.
All I want for Christmas is for this pain to go away, but I know that is not going to happen.
At least I finally got an appointment with a Pain Management Clinic. Just really annoyed that I had to wait for about 5 months, only to get an appointment thats still another 3 months away.
Heres hoping I don't need to keep relying on my years supply of Panadiene Forte, and this pain eases up in time for the New Year.

I am hoping for a better New Years then last year. One that isn't spent falling asleep on the lounge at 11 pm, drowsy from too many pain killers.

sunday morning

his bedroom smelt like sex
my dress smelt like cigarettes
his shampoo and conditioner smelt amazing



my hair now smells amazing

04/12/2009

awesome night. I think a few too many cocktails were consumed, but they were sssoooooooo yummy I couldn't stop drinking them!!!


To celebrate passing Tafe, Rose, Letisha, her fiance Tyson and I all went out for cocktails. We started at the Brewery, where cocktails were $6, then $7, the $8.
Started out by skulling a Long Island Iced Tea, as I got there late, and Rosie and Letisha were onto their second cocktails, so I had to catch up!!!
We then got our next cocktails - Cosmos!!! Then played pool. I can't remember who won, but it was a game that went on forever, as I started drinking a strawberry Daquiri throughout the game.

We then decided to head to Glasshouse, where at the bar I saw a sign.
I think it was the sign that killed me.
The sign that said COCKTAILS!!! $5 TILL 11 PM!!!

Since it was only about 9 pm, multiple $5 cocktails were consumed.
My night consisted a little like long island iced tea, cosmo, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, water, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, strawberry daquiri, water, water, water, spew, water, water, water, spew, water water, spew, water water, water, walking home. With dancing thrown in somewhere in between. And getting photos taken, which I kinda don't remember happening, but Letisha does, and she said I said something about how I'm going to be on the internet.
Letisha then found us on the internet. So I'm on the internet. Looking pretty wasted.


More cocktails will have to be consumed soon. Hopefully without the vomit (and all the bad seedy guys, which I have left out this post as they spiked my friends drink, and don't want to fill a post of awesomeness, full of explicitives.

all over

Tafe is finished. All done. Now I'm holidays for who knows how long. I'm hoping it's not long as I really want to get a job, start saving money, have something to do other then roast in the sun all day every day.

The good thing about the course I did, is my typing has improved so much!!! I did a fair few typing tests yesterday, and got a few 100% accuracies, and the teacher wrote me out a proper letter stating I have a typing speed of 68.5 with 98.8% accuracy. Which, personally, I think is amazing :)

I definitely think my accuracy has improved heaps since I started Tafe.

Still undecided about going back to Tafe next year. I know I'd much rather have a job and work and save as much money as I can to take me to London, and try to finally get my compensation claim finalised, as I'm going to be using most of that money to get my overseas. I also owe my mum $$$, and I want a new tattoo or two. Maybe even buy a good pair of jeans to take o/s, as I know it's going to be cold, so lots of warm clothes will be needed!!!

I'm going to be so bored if I don't get a job, also a little down, as I want to work. I really want to work. I did this course in hopes of improving my chances of getting a job, making myself more employable. I've applied for so many jobs, and have gotten so many rejection emails, a fair few just don't even contact if I haven't been successful for an interview (which I think is rude). I have had a fair few interviews, but so far, unsuccessful. I did have one interview last Friday, and I want this job ssssooooooooooooooooooooo much!!! I think I will shed a tear or two if I don't get it.